Raney, Sin and Parker

*Note* Some of the stories, from my previous blogs might be repeated as I update and write new blogs for Frontline Roundtable, which is a blog for our church (http://blogs.frontlinedc.com/)

My two daughters play together like angels and fight like the devil. One day after one of their fights I asked Raney why were they fighting? She informed me that she and Katherine did not like one another that day.

I asked what she thought God would say to that. She eagerly responded, "I don't know- what would He say- tell me!"

I told her that God gave them to one another and He doesn't like it when we are not kind to each other. God wants them to be friends and to be sweet with one another and that it hurts his Heart when we hurt one another.

To which Raney angrily replied, "Ahhgg, Stop telling God stuff! Don't tell Him what I am doing!"

I hated to inform her that God was already quite aware of what was going on in our house....

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:29-32

Sometimes we feel the same way. We hope that God doesn’t really ‘see’ what we are doing. And yet, most of us know that God sees our hearts and knows the thoughts we are thinking though we do not speak or act on them. He knows us. That realization is comforting and rather frightening at the same time.

My son Parker is learning to confess his sins, he is relying much on the fact that God knows everything about him. He thinks that he shouldn’t have to tell God since he cannot remember all of the sin and God is all knowing anyway. Parker is also trying to work a deal with me that once a week should about cover it, that way he can store up the sins before confessing them. However, we all need to come face to face with our sins, calling them by name so we understand the depravity of our sinful nature and how it grieves God when we choose to sin.

"If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives." 1 John 1:8-10

Yes, God knows when we sin. But, He desires us to know as well. As I told Parker, maybe the more he confessed his sins to God and asked for forgiveness, the more he (Parker) would understand what actions grieve God. The same is true for us as well.

We all need to realize the things in our lives that come between us and God, we need to confess, and then we need to repent- turning back to God and His desires for us…. because we love God too much to keep doing what we were doing.

"Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God." 2 Corinthians 7:1

Friday Night Lights

This is a purely selfish blog...one of my favorite shows may go off the air and just when I became a faithful viewer!

If you have any feelings regarding Friday Night Lights...go to this website: http://www.savefridaynightlights.tv/

I have to say, I am encouraged. When I signed the petition- I was seven hundred and something but now they are up to 8,000!

blessings,

julie

Gender Gaps

My young son was walking up the stairs talking to one of his friends. I could hear their conversation clearly and though I wasn’t eavesdropping, I don’t think Parker would have appreciated knowing that I was listening.

“How do you get to have more phone calls to her cell phone?” asked Parker’s friend Matthew.

“If I am nice to her and do what she says I can earn more phone calls, “ Parker replied.

Are you kidding me? Parker is trying to EARN the ability to make phone calls to a girl?

I didn’t confront him at that time but the thought of my eight-year-old son being manipulated really frustrated me.Parker is discovering girls. And he is enjoying the discovery very much. As parents, it is hard to stand by and not do anything to stop the journey. I am realizing that the many hang-ups we receive are little girls calling. Star 69 and caller ID are such wonderful inventions.

Parker still likes to use the standard elementary party line that ‘he doesn’t like girls’ but Todd and I watch him get wrapped around the axle regarding a few of the girls in his class, not knowing what to do with all the feelings he has especially because the girls are interfering with his other boy relationships. The girls are dividing the boys and inserting themselves into their business. Todd would definitely say that I still do this and it is not regulated to just 3rd grade girls!

I have to tell you that I have been surprised by how aggressive the young girls can be. I have heard the same thing from my other Christian friends with sons in high school. Boys don’t have to work very hard to get what they want…the girls are making themselves available- manipulating situations, parents, rules, and the boys themselves to be in control. They are offering themselves- wholeheartedly- and our young men find it very hard to always be the one to say ‘no’.

In my opinion these characteristics are prime examples of what is going wrong with leadership in the church and home. Boys are failing to become the leaders that they were intended to be because women who do not allow them to lead surround them.

Uh, oh…I can already hear many of you freaking out.

Women do not have to push overs, allowing men to walk all over them- but we do need to learn to step back sometimes. I would use the term ‘stand down’ allowing for the men in our lives to ‘stand up’.

While doing a Beth Moore bible study years ago, I came across a scripture that has stayed with me. Acts 13:49-50:
"The word of the Lord spread through the whole region. But the Jews incited the God-fearing women of high standing and the leading men of the city. They stirred up persecution against Paul and Barnabas, and expelled them from their region."

You see, when the Jews wanted to get Paul and Barnabas out of town- they not only went to the male leaders- but also to the women. Women have influence and can be the cause of stirring up things that are not of God. So can men…but….

After talking to Todd about this whole issue, I understand I don’t have all the answers. I desire to raise my daughters to be strong, independent women after God’s own heart. I want them to wait until the phone rings, I want them to demand respect, courtesy and Godly leadership from the men they meet, and I think that is easier to accomplish in this day and age than for Todd and I to raise our son to be the leader God desires him to be. We fear that if he never has to put forth effort- then where will his passion come from?

I don’t want to have the gender relationships regress to women becoming property of no value- but I desire there to be more balance in our culture. And if our culture refuses to change, then our churches still need to.

I completely understand that many of the young girls are just looking for some type of affirmation because many of them come from homes without male influence, leadership or even presence.

So, where do we stop the cycle? How? Why? Why do women make up most of the volunteer base in most churches? Why do so many women attend church by themselves or with just their children? Why is there a vacuum of Godly Christian male leadership?Any ideas?

God's Touchdowns

I got out of the shower and heard my children fighting in the distance. But, rather than facing being the arbitrator in one more ridiculous argument, I turned on the blow dryer to drown out their sounds. My thoughts were repetitive: "Why me?" "Why can't they just get along for more than thirty minute increments?" "I just want them to be quiet!" and the always-effective silent scream in my head, "AGGHHH!"

Suffering. You might think that I don't know what true suffering actually is...and you might even be right. However, we all experience different types of sufferings in various seasons of life. For a stay at home mother- I can tell you- these kinds of days are truly days of suffering. They are the kind of days that give feet to the song, "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to".

Recently, in my studies of the Gospel of John as well as Nancy Guthrie’s One Year Book of Hope, I have come to the understanding that it is okay to sit down and weep, to cry out, to have a pity party...as long it is for a short time. Jesus is present even in those seemingly senseless times of pain.

He is Savior, Lord, and Messiah. But, He is also Friend, Father, the Good Shepherd and the Great High Priest.

I was watching one of my very favorite TV shows, Friday Night Lights. One of the star players had his hopes dashed regarding his future college plans. His wonderful mother came in and offered one of those phrases that seem rather trite but are stuffed full of truth. She said, "I know Whitmore wasn't your dream, but when a door closes, God opens a window. He don't ever fumble the ball-He always gets a touchdown- that is God's plan". And I thought, "Wow... that is so true."

Sorrow. Grief. Suffering. The ending of dreams, the realization that fantasy doesn't match reality, and the experience of weeping by yourself when no one is around- But God's plan and His sovereignty reigns.

Jesus, even knowing what was going to happen with Lazarus still understood loss and comforted the people in their sorrow and yet pointed them to the truth found in Him.

John 11
33When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34"Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied. 35Jesus wept. 40Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" 41So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, "Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me."

God's touchdown. It may not come about in a play you recognize, understand or even appreciate at the time...but He still comes. He comes to wrap His arms around you, sharing in your sorrow and guiding you to His truth.

During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered
Hebrews 5:7-8

Jesus gave us an example...we can learn obedience in the midst of suffering. Following and hearing God with reverent submission.

My favorite truth of sorrow or suffering is the gift of the Holy Spirit. Guthrie says, "The Holy Spirit is God loving you up close, drawing near to you, living inside you...He brings conviction of sin, but he also brings comfort in distress" (One Year Book of Hope, pg. 25). And when you cannot pray due to numbness, frustration, grief, or heartache- the Holy Spirit is there to intercede for you:
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. Romans 8:26-27.

Sometimes you might even be expressing "trust more out of a desire to trust than a confession of the reality of {your} souls" (One Year Book of Hope, pg. 29).

Thoughts?